fake food- fake food- fake food!

Much of my procrastination this semester has been relegated to reading and disseminating the animal rights/animal welfare argument, as well as reading dialogues on the internet about fake food/real food/vegan food/ what is the best diet. sometimes, it takes a bit of digging to find a provocative post or twitter conversation. But other times things just show up. For instance, yesterday, after turning in a terribly written paper, I found this email in my inbox.

Silk Lite Chocolate Ad
(Note: click on it to see a higher quality image)




i couldn't resist altering a bit of this deceptive advertising for some post-paper-agony-fun. It made me laugh. thanks to the cornucopia institute for enlightening me on soy production...

Altered Silk Lite Chocolate Ad
(click for higher quality)




you can't see it in the image, but I thought i'd take a little liberty with the privacy policy too:

You are receiving this email because you opted in (or not) to receive future communications from Silk. Silk will probably not share your information with other entities except as may be required for fulfillment of offers, prizes, or other similar purposes. We will, however, deceive you when we switch from organic to nonorganic soybeans. We might take precautions to keep your information safe and private. To learn more, see our Privacy Policy.

You can stop receiving communications (LIES) at any time by unsubscribing here.

If you want to bitch about Silk, please contact us. Or you may write to us at WhiteWave Foods Company, Consumer Affairs, 12002 Airport Way, Broomfield, CO 80021. © 2009 WhiteWave Foods (P.S. WE're actually owned by Dean Foods, the largest producer of "organic industrial" (i.e.) deceptive dairy in the country. We have no soul. We bought out the White Wave people years ago, and have been using their name as a front to make you think you're supporting some alternative-to-dairy cause....Too bad we're sometimes the only soymilk left in the grocery store!!!!


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All of this to save 10 calories. Seriously? Seriously? (Ok, I don't know the calorie count of chocolate, but the calorie count of regular is 100). And to save some fat? How many years will it take for people to realize that Fat is not the enemy. Overconsumption of nutrient-deficient foods, filled with chemicals and preservatives, is the enemy, as far as I'm concerned. Drink the freakin' full fat soymilk. That's the way the soybean was intended to be consumed- whole. (And some would argue, fermented and not in GMO-laced veggie patties. I agree. A post on those should be forthcoming as well).

It makes me sad that people think they need to eat an altered food product to be healthier.

i'll be the first to say that regular Silk products are still in my house, because they're the only thing my mom will buy at walmart. i'd like to get some organic stuff, but with the snowstorm we've been stuck here for going on 5 days....

Next, I'd like to take on the Happy Cows Come From California advertisements. I think if we superimposed the happy (read: inane and retarded) dialogue from the commercials onto some images of cows living in shit, farmworkers being abused, and some pus-filled udders, that'd be great. Or this one from Purdue chickens could be made into a parody where the chickens bitch slap the lying CEO into oblivion. Will anyone help me in this quest?

summer skills/revelations

-ability to make delicious bread without a food processor, kitchen aid stand mixer or wood-fired oven
-my green bean plants are GROWING LITTLE BEANS OUT THE BOTTOM!!!!!!!!!!
-processed food is super gross to me and i don't want to eat any of it ahhhhhhh
-mint tea
-antiques
-being stuck to the internet sucks
-can i please work on a homestead in va/nc???

commencement 2009

I am seriously bored waiting down here for my babysitting charge to come. And no longer at all excited. I have noticed that when I do something twice, I am always comparing it to the last time. Harvard things definitely operate on a semester-one time thing. I'm hoping that this girl's nanny will take care of her at night. I don't even know what I'm going to do with them this afternoon. TV?!??!


And then, after a grueling and nerve-wracking plane flight on Sunday, along with my last purchase at Dunkin Donuts for a few months, THE SOUTH!

dinner

i finally remembered to photograph it!

and i just realized what heat is good for and not. next time, I am going to fry the noodles with oil, garlic and salt first, then take it off the heat to add the soy sauce mixture. otherwise the noodles seem to absorb all the flavor and are left a little dry. i should also let the broccoli marinate in the soy sauce a little first. but the drizzled almond butter was a nice touch.

strawberries and cherries

wherein i test out my new camera and photograph large things that were cheap and/or free.

dumpster diving attempt #1

Alice and I spent our Friday night traipsing around Union Square with the New York City Freegans. The find wasn't as great as some I have had in Boston, but I hope tomorrow's will be better. Among the finds were tomatoes, apples, artichoke, ravioli, 40 starbucks paper bags, cauliflower (which tasted excellent today!), shitloads of bread and baguettes from Le Pain Quotidien, bagles, muffins (always a little sketch, especially the bran ones, to me), baskets, myriad shopping bags, magazines from last week with the cover ripped off--rolling stone, OK, and People to name a few. I could go on.

For future dives, I recommend plenty of plastic shopping bags, rubber gloves, a towel, and hand sanitizer. Oh,and put your wallet in a bag too for safekeeping.

i love

robert sean leonard.

much faster pass the years by

Sadly none of my fellow blog-mates kept up the blogging during college, which is what all this was intended for.

Latest Harvard news: Harvard extends financial aid to families making up to $180,000. From $60K to $120K families will pay up to 10% of their yearly income in tuition, then 10% up to 180K. Tuition will remain free for families making under 60 grand a year. Of course, as does any story involving Harvard College, it makes the top-emailed article from the NYT website.

Oh Harvard, of course you were the most affordable college for me to attend. Thank you...

Some people criticized the move, saying it would free up income for families to buy extra SUV's or down payments on summer homes. Really? I haven't explored the median income of Harvard families, or even what constitutes "high-income" anymore these days, nor am I sure that SUV's are the first place that liberal suburbanites would look-- I mean, aren't they the most educated about global warming?

But I digress. The NYT article did raise an interesting point: more affluent Harvard students can afford to take unpaid internships with professors since mom and dad will cover your housing for the semester. But when I went to the Center for Public Interest Careers info session, housing is only covered by one of their summer programs (and in NYC, $3500 as a stipend....) Plus the length of the program makes it impossible to get a summer job after it ends, and doesn't seem as thought you could get a part-time job during the internship either.

So, what if I wanted to do another one of their programs?

Well, they give you a flier on housing "resources". But a staff member told me that generally what happens to students not in the NYC program is that they take internships in places where they have family members or can commute from home.

In light of things like this, the job as secretary for the Harvard Summer School Program ($11/hr, free room and board) looks like a piece of cake. But what do you learn how to do? File stuff, answer phones, and make labels for the important people, the people that your more affluent peers are learning how to be like.

Bitches.

Sometimes, I seriously think I am going to end up as the world's best administrative assistant. I'll be known as the "Harvard" secretary, and my diploma will be up on the wall in my cubicle. I'll supplement my paycheck from the office by selling vegan treats in the break room, until my boss nags me to start my own business with the things. But, since I never went to Harvard Business, I won't know how to have a profit margin, I tell him, and I'm afraid to lose an initial investment.

So I continue selling cupcakes and expanding waistlines till my retirement.

Sounds like a plan...

Colder grow the days

Oh, back at the old Harvard grind. Also known as working for 5 hours at the library and reading three pages of the fifty plus pages I am supposed to read for tomorrow.

Disclaimer

I don't really know how you feel. The jury is out on caring.

Although Virgos apparently have intuitive feelings about other people, and are able to sense a divine presence within themselves. This is what I learned from the horoscope man at work. Staff members get free readings, so I went on my break to see what was up. Apparently, Pluto is in my ascending. And plans to be for quite some time. Meaning that I'm going through intense transformations. Of course, this could be the whole 18-21 year old phase. And I never said I'd believe in astrology. But, it was amusing. More amusing than church, I promise you.

I have spent a good deal of time reading some interesting blogs about evil, stupid customers at Starbucks, south Florida japanese restaurants, and classy bistros in NYC. All very amusing, all harping on that unfortunate class of person known as the entitled yuppie, SUV driving soccer mom or senile old person who enjoys yelling at foodservice employees over their own daunting stupidity.

Seriously, I wonder if the offenders ever read about themselves on a blog, or realize that there is life behind the counter; yes, that is a living, breathing person with feelings, no, they don't want to remake your triple americano with nonfat/soy foam for the fourth time, and they are handling your food, why are you being a bitch to them?

I mean, the worst thing I had happen to me since I got back from vacation was this old guy who spilled a cup of coffee in front of the bakery case, and then was mad when I charged him for the coffee and the coffee cake, since he had apparently paid for the coffee already. But I hadn't remembered ringing him up.

Apparently there's this one lady who will make you cry if you get her smoothie wrong; too much cranberry juice and it has no flavor, and you are therefore the scum of the earth. She's one of the sandal-with-sock, bad makeup, two-piece cardigan with matching pants and string purse type ladies, hat optional. Bitchiness, imminent.

There is also a woman who decided to take it upon herself to come in a few times a week and organize our half-used coupon books into a little box, with each coupon neatly cut out and organized by item. She has somehow gotten my supervisor to give her a free vegetable drink for doing this...and has befriended another string-purse and sandal woman. Together, they camp out in front of the hot bar until 8 pm, sampling everything so they know what to get for half price. Then, they bitch about us throwing away what's left at 8:15. They stay in the cafe forever, as I'm trying to put up tables. The other night, they were talking about their first dates, or boyfriends....it was not a topic I wanted to hear while scraping unidentified food objects off the vinyl seats.